the last time I wrote I was feeling somewhat optimistic regarding the outcome of consequences for Lacey Ambro, the drunk driver who killed my daughter and another teenager and severly injured another. I hope I do not repeat myself too much in this second part...I suffer from PTSD or ADD, one of those that prevent me from not keeping my train of though straight at times... bear with me.
So the last time I wrote, Lacey had been offered a deal which would in turn combine the deaths of my daughter, Zoey Roanoke, and the death of James John English IV, into one felony DUI with death charge carrying a sentence of anwhere from 2-20 years. The third charge of Felony DUI with substantional bodily harm would stay as is and I believe that charge carries a 2-10 year sentence. When I initially heard this news I kind of lost it. Fell apart drank too much to try and numb the pain, and even got myself into some trouble (no not a DUI). You will find that I am an honest open person, you will find that I also do not judge. There is a higher power, whoever that may be, that will make any final judgement. There I go, off track again! Anyway, a meeting was set with lacey and the living victim as well as the families of all the victims for a chance for Lacey to apologize as she was going to accept the deal they offered her. Tjis deal couldve removed as much as 20 years off of her sentence. Well the day before this meeting, she changed her mind and refused the deal so we go to trial sept. 20th. The DA has assured me that there will not be another deal offered, nor will the trial be re-set again. This is what i wanted, however I am scared to death at what I am going to see and hear during the trial. There will be pictures of the accident shown and of their bodies in the hospital. I feel like I will be reliving it all over again...The past 3 1/2 years since I lost my beautiful daughter has been an internal battle. I miss her and my old "normal" more than I can put into words. I resent people who don't have to live with this pain. The problems I had before this seem so menial in comparison. I get overwhelmed and confused much more easily than I used to and I detach from people who I feel I cant relate to. I don't sleep, and I feel like my heart will pound out of my chest sometimes. The heartache is unbearable at times... I don't know who reads my blogs but I need to write so I don't just keep it bottled up in my head... I'm hoping that seeing justice prevail will help bring some closure and lead to my healing....
Revenge won't bring your child back. Rather ask yourself what was my child doing in her car? Should you not have been more careful?
ReplyDeleteAccidents happen sober or not.
Rather find forgiveness in your soul and forgive this poor girl and move on.
Pine. Fuck you! Fuck you for this cold, empty, gross comment. and I hope you never have to live through this womens pain. We all have resentments. Her writings of her own experience and feelings are valid and normal. lastly. fuck you for being a poor human being.
DeletePine! Im glad you needed to put your two cents in…
ReplyDeleteRevenge was never mentioned and moving on is not an option for some of us. We dont need to ask what OUR child was doing in that car. Children don't ponder consequence to their actions they don't think about the reality of what can come of there decisions.
She was stating a fact that having some closure will be good but not sure how she will react to re-living the accident of OUR child through a trial that has been drug out 4+ years. In the United States we are promised justice unfortunately some get relief from this process. Through the final sentencing she found the power to forgive Lacy which has given her some relief.
Unless you have direct experience I suggest you think twice before you write telling someone to MOVE ON through the death of their child. Unless you have hugged your childs lifeless body one last time to say good bye (I would not wish this upon anyone) which I know you dont based on your ignorant statement. Your last statement is true however there is relief in the power of forgiveness. Drunk driving accidents are not accidents. DUI accidents are caused not through a series of unfortunate circumstance or outside forces beyond our control but by bad decisions which are against the law (bad decisions that cause death are not immunity from prosecution). DUI accidents are caused by a careless act that could be prevented, this is why we are here to prevent the preventable not to MOVE ON, forgive, and bury more innocent victims to this senless preventable behavior.